Bumpy Beginnings

Colleen Howard
11 minutes ago
3 min read

If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness. — 2 Corinthians 11:30, ESV

My first year as a classroom teacher was disastrous. I was overwhelmed by

doubt, negative feelings, and self-critical thoughts. Every day, I thought,

“Someone’s going to walk in here and find out I have no idea what I’m doing!” My self-assessment revealed the real issue—a lack of experience, not a lack of education. The move from teaching small groups to a large class didn’t go smoothly. I made many mistakes when I transitioned from a special needs setting

to a general fifth-grade classroom.

Regrouping and Starting Anew: A Classroom Transformation

One day, overcome by a conviction to regroup, I instructed the students to gather with me in a circle on the floor. Huddled together, I confessed that I’d caused them to have gotten off to a bumpy

beginning. From there, I shared changes I planned to implement in classroom management and explained how those adjustments would affect them. They asked questions, I gave answers, and we agreed to start over.

This wasn’t an easy task and the transition of the classroom’s climate took

considerable time. I realized there’s always something more to learn, and coming

clean about your mistakes is humbling, but effective.

However, that didn’t eliminate the persistent doubt about my teaching skills. I was

bombarded with nagging thoughts of someone walking into the classroom and

discovering I was unqualified.

Understanding Imposter Syndrome: The Doubt That Challenges Competence

Psychologists have given this phenomenon of doubt that I experienced the name Imposter Syndrome—which plants seeds of skepticism in the minds of qualified people. This syndrome is characterized by persistent self-doubt and fear of being exposed as a fraud, despite evidence of one’s competence.

God used this experience to encourage me to continue learning more about my

chosen profession. This prompted me to return to school to learn more. My

program of study turned out to be an exhilarating, exhausting two years, but

worth every moment.

Embracing Weakness to Highlight Divine Strength

God is aware that we struggle and we’re not perfect — He created us. But our weaknesses should bring God’s strength to the forefront. His word tells us that we should boast about our weaknesses, which shines a light on His strength. Sometimes we focus more on our weaknesses than our successes. Yet, it’s vital to flip the script by sharing our struggles and asking for God’s help.

It’s just as important to acknowledge our strengths and wins. When we do this, He can and

will restore us and help us as we depend on Him and as we remain grateful for

our gifts.

Prayer: Dear God, I come before You, acknowledging our imperfections and the weaknesses that we often carry. Thank You for understanding us completely, even in our struggles. Help us to embrace our flaws and to see them as opportunities to showcase Your strength and power in our lives. Guide us to boast in our weaknesses, as Your word teaches us, so that Your light may shine brightly through us. May we not dwell solely on our shortcomings, but also recognize and celebrate our achievements and victories that come from You. Lord, remind us to share our struggles with others and to seek Your assistance in times of need. As we lean on You, may we feel Your restoration and grace. We are grateful for the blessings You have bestowed upon us, and we thank You for the strength You provide. In your holy name, we pray, Amen.